


Finest Years

by Tarlan



Category: The Magnificent Seven (TV)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-06-02
Updated: 2003-06-02
Packaged: 2017-10-20 01:26:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/207335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tarlan/pseuds/Tarlan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Vin takes Chris for granted one time too many.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Finest Years

  


_  
You sheltered me from harm  
You kept me warm. You kept me warm.  
You gave my life to me  
You set me free. You set me free._  


Bitterness was a nasty taste in his mouth and he tried to rinse it away with a shot of whiskey. It didn't work. Seeing Chris giving someone else that special smile he thought had been reserved for only him was sending Vin into a black hole of despair.

He thought back to the days when they had first met, the way Chris had accepted him for what he was and had protected his back from the many bounty hunters looking to claim the reward on his head. They had ridden together, fought together and, finally, found love together in each other's arms. He remembered his joy on the day Chris handed him a piece of paper, signed by Judge Travis, that gave him back his life, setting him free from the fear of being strung up like a mangy dog. Vin had no idea what miracles or strings Chris had pulled. Some how he had managed to get Eli Joe's second in command, Yates, to testify that Vin played no part in the murder of that farmer, naming Eli Joe as the killer. All Vin knew was that Chris had done this for him, out of love.

  


_  
The finest years I ever knew  
Were all the years I had with you_  


The group of seven had been the law in the small frontier town for almost four years and, to Vin, these had been the best years of his life. He had everything he could ever want. He had good friends, a home, and he had Chris in his life and in his bed. How did it all go so wrong?

  


_  
And I would give everything I own  
Give up my life, my heart, my home  
And I would give everything I own  
Just to have you back again._  


Vin could not help the flicker of a smile when he saw the beaming grin Chris aimed at Josiah, hearing the deep laughter in response. It was not difficult to read the love shining in Josiah's eyes, not to someone who had learned to read the nuances, the tiny flickers that would warn if a man was about to draw and shoot. He wondered if Chris was showing Josiah how to love again, just as he had been shown.

  


_  
You taught me how to love  
What it's of. What it's of.  
You never said too much but still you showed the way.  
_  


Vin had never had cause to laugh much before he came to this town. His life had been one long struggle from the time he lost his mama until the day he met those perceptive green eyes across the dusty street. Having a pard to watch his back had made life a little more carefree. Having a lover to share his bed had let down his barriers completely, and they had filled many a night with loving and laughter. He recalled all the times when they would sit or lie together, hardly a word passing between them and yet speaking volumes through a gesture or a glance. Or so he thought.

He loved the times when Chris was sleeping, allowing his eyes to rove along the lean figure, to roam over the rugged yet beautiful sleep-softened face. In his mind's eye he could see the firm curve of ass, could pinpoint every scar or blemish in the otherwise perfect, ivory flesh. His fingers itched to trace a path over the silky skin, to delve into the crease between those pale globes and stroke deep inside, reaching the sweet spot. He loved watching the ecstasy on Chris's face as climax overtook him, falling headlong into the darkness of lust-dilated eyes. The love shining in those satiated eyes would carry him over the edge and then he would collapse into the surprisingly strong arms, and yet enfolded in that soft embrace.

  


_  
And from watching you  
Nobody else could ever know.  
The part of me that can't let go._  


Chris turned for a moment and their eyes met. Vin could swear he could see a slight mistiness fill those stormy green eyes, a lingering sadness, but then Chris looked away and the moment was gone. He wondered if that sadness was for him or whether it was for what they had lost. It would not surprise him if Chris had been sad for him. Maybe he had recognized the yearning and bitterness that filled Vin whenever their paths crossed. Vin sighed and swallowed another shot of whiskey, feeling the buzz as the fiery liquid flooded through his veins.

  


_  
And I would give everything I own  
Give up my life, my heart, my home  
And I would give everything I own  
Just to have you back again._  


He wished he could find some way to win Chris back. Wished he could make the past three weeks just disappear as if they had never happened. He missed the warmth of those eyes as they gazed upon him after a night full of loving. He missed the soft laughter and the husky voice that whispered in the night. He longed to hear his name fall from those perfect lips once more as they rushed towards mutual annihilation and rebirth.

  


_  
Is there someone you know  
You're loving them so  
But taking them all for granted  
You may lose them some day  
Someone takes them away  
And they don't hear the words you long to say._  


There was a time when no words had been needed between them; a time when a look was enough and Vin had foolishly thought this meant he did not have to tell Chris how he felt. Looking back Vin could recall the many occasions when he had felt so comfortable in his love for Chris that he did not seem important to explain where he was going and why. He had rode off on one pretext or another, taking it for granted that Chris understood his need to find solitude, expecting Chris to be waiting for him in the shack that they had made their home.

That was until the day he rode back to find Chris had taken up with Josiah in his absence.

"Stupid. Real stupid."

With head bowed, he spoke softly into the shot glass, finally noticing that it was empty and sloshing more of the Red-eye into it. As he raised the glass to his lips he caught Josiah watching him, concern in the pale blue eyes. In defiance, Vin slugged back the whiskey, glaring at Josiah but gained only a smug smile in response. It was not as if he could even hate Josiah. The man had been a friend - a good friend to both of them. He wondered if Josiah had discovered the joy of being with Chris, if the ex-preacher looked down on that beautiful face as he thrust deep inside and saw the likeness of a fallen angel in his arms.

  


_  
And I would give everything I own  
Give up my life, my heart, my home  
And I would give everything I own  
Just to have you back again.  
Just to touch you, once again._  


It hurt so much, seeing Chris and not being able to touch him. He wanted to hold him, to whisper all the words of love he had withheld through his thoughtlessness. As he stared back down at the table top, Vin caught sight of darkness descending beside him. He looked up to find Chris seated beside him, watching him, those green eyes displaying no emotion whatsoever. He wished he could command a poker face to match but the alcohol burned through his head, freeing the shackles he had placed around his emotions. Vin cleared his throat.

"Hey, Cowboy."

The ice in the cool green eyes began to thaw at the familiar name and Vin wondered if anyone other than him had ever dared to call Chris a cowboy - and lived.

"How are you doing, Vin?"

Throwing caution to the wind Vin let the whiskey loosen his tongue, speaking softly, his voice a little hoarse, choked with emotion.

"Ain't been right without you, Chris. Give you anything I got to have you back again."

"Anything?"

"Hell. I'd give you everything."

He dropped his eyes back to the table top, not wanting to see the pity that would fill Chris's eyes, but knowing he had already revealed too much of the anguish and love he felt for this man beside him. If only a look could be enough.

"Then it's a deal."

Vin looked up, eyes wide in shock, looking close at Chris for the first time since the day they parted and seeing the hope in those wary eyes.

"What about Josiah?"

"Josiah's a friend. Nothing more. Told me to stop being so pigheaded and go listen to what you have to say."

Vin turned grateful eyes towards Josiah and saw there was still love in those wise blue depths, but not just for Chris. He reached out and touched Chris's hand, just lightly, not enough to attract any of the unwanted kind of attention.

"Been such a fool, Chris."

"Yep. So. We going to talk all night, or we going to head to my room?"

Vin thought back to the way he had arrogantly presumed that their non-verbal communication was enough and he found himself smiling for the first time in weeks.

"How about we do both, Cowboy."

THE END


End file.
